Women and performance enhancing drugs, a survey.

photo @aaron_palko_photography

Emma Jarman

PED’s, gear, gym candy, ‘roids, juice, skittles, pumpers, stackers; there are a million words for steroids and other performance enhancing drugs in the strength sport community (and others) and their use is an accepted part of powerlifting and bodybuilding in untested competition (and tested, but that’s neither here nor there) … for men. Women, on the other hand, haven’t quite reached the “acceptance” stage yet. We’re still stuck somewhere between denial and bargaining, trying to become and remain competitive in high-level competition while also battling the stigma of virilization (both actual and perceived). Along with the “they’ll turn you into a man” chorus echoed by uninformed women and fragile-ego’d men, women also battle the stigma of our choice to denounce the ideal of “feminine purity” imposed by a male-dominated sport, society and world, not only by competing in strength sports to begin with, but by supplementing our performance with PED’s.

The thing about steroids and women is it’s not that we don’t use them, it’s that we don’t talk about them. Men exaggerate their use, joke about it in open space, make light of the severe physical and psychological side effects with punny one-liners, while women, if to breathe word of them at all, typically underreport their use, and only admit to it in private, safe, one-on-one trusted exchanges, lest their accomplishments undoubtedly be discredited. Men aren’t entirely to blame, women stigmatize other women nearly as much as men do. Subconscious consensus seems to be: men who take PED’s are athletes, women who take PED’s are cheaters.

Because of this, there is a dangerous lack of information for women, from women, about appropriate ways to dose, stack and administer PED’s safely. I don’t claim to know everything about PED’s, but I do know how to ask questions and have open conversations, which is exactly what I did a couple months ago with this survey, and encourage you to do going forward. The following near-50 pages of answers to a few questions I presented in a completely anonymous survey via Instagram regarding PED usage are provided entirely by female powerlifters. Though I don’t know who answered what, I do know who committed to participating, and these women run the gamut from professional to newbie; world record holders to fledgling athletes; women who have experimented on themselves enough to write a book about it to women looking for advice on their anticipated first cycle.

With that said, I can not guarantee all of the advice is good. To be perfectly honest, I believe a small amount of it is flat-out dangerous. This is not scientific fact, this is an anecdotal collection of experiences. I implore you to be careful with the information presented below and be smart in your decisions going forward. I do not hope to see this used as a reference, but as a tool to start conversations; to help women talk to women about safe and effective PED usage that encourages longevity in the sport and overall health.

There are a few graphs and charts showing age, time in sport, and more quantitative information, but the long form questions, in order, in case you’d like to jump around go as follows:
What have you taken?
Are there any PED’s you haven’t tried but want to?
What effect did you get from the PED’s you took? How did they work individually and/or together?
How did progress differ before vs after taking PED’s?
When in your fitness journey did you start taking PED’s?
Did anyone pressure you to take PED’s?
What was your goal in taking PED’s?
Any reasons beside athletic performance you took PED’s?
When is a good time for women to start PED’s?
What is your favorite stack and why?
In prep, what is your PED “schedule?”
Do you run anything offseason?
When going off, wean/taper or cold turkey?
What PED would you never try again?
What side effects have you experienced, good/bad, and what drug caused them?
Any surprisingly enjoyable side effects?
When you go off do your side effects disappear?
Have you ever used a PED you suspect was fake?
What surprised you about taking PED’s
Advice for new users?
Advice for women looking to up the dose or try something new?
How far is too far?
What is a “good” starter PED and dosage?
What misconceptions are you familiar with about women and PED’s?
Who have you lied to about PED usage?
If you could change something about your past usage, what?

If anyone has any questions at all you may direct them toward me and I will help as best I can. My email is jarman.emma@gmail.com or DM @emma_theestallion.

PED’s you haven’t tried but want to

  • Winstrol (winnie)
  • I would like to try other PED’s but don’t really feel I have enough information to do safely, regarding sides and possible long term effects.
  • Not really, I’m content with anavar.
  • I’m curious about small dose of testosterone (test).
  • I have thought about trying test at some point, but I’m not committed to it.
  • I like the thought of trenbolone (tren) but knowing how bad the sides would be, I would never take it.
  • Methenolone (primobolan/primo) and winstrol
  • Nandrolone decanoate (Deca-durabolin/deca).
  • No, maybe masteron (mast).
  • Tren, test e, cheque drops.
  • Not really. I genuinely only have taken anavar (var) and have kept the same dose (20mg/day) the same since the start. It’s worked very well for me and I am content.
  • Would like to try halotestin (halo) but it’s hard to find and when I’ve found it it’s pricey.
  • I’ve heard good things about Equipoise (EQ).
  • Halo.
  • I am interested in trying human growth hormone (growth, HGH), I just haven’t yet.
  • Yes, but I honestly am not sure which ones are safer for women and how to properly use non-orals (injectables).
  • Halo.
  • Nandrolone phenylpropionate (NPP), HGH, primo.
  • Anadrol and HGH.
  • HGH.
  • Winstrol, anavar.
  • HGH, but I’ll most likely wait until I’m in my 40s to try that if I still want to be/can powerlift in those years.
  • Turinabol (t-bol) and winnie.
  • T-bol, eventually, maybe. I’ve heard good things from other female lifters. Then again, var is still working great, so I don’t feel any burning desire to push it where I don’t need to. Gear is already a big step past “balance,” but it can be done without being reckless, if that makes sense.
  • Maybe primo, but is so hard to find real primo I’m not willing to take the risk.
  • Growth.
  • HGH.

What effect did you get from the PED’s you took? How did they work individually and/or together?

  • Stronger, able to build muscle faster.
  • I have only taken anavar and started at a low dose, 10-mg to 5-mg morning and night. I ran it for 16 weeks. I felt stronger by the end but really noticed around 6-8 weeks was almost a “peak” in strength. I have run three similar cycles upping the dosage the last week to 15-mg to 20-mg. Currently in off season and wanted to run a quick 6-week cycle to see what would happen. We just decided to do a meet in February, so I am starting meet prep shortly. I was only able to get what I think are 50-mg tabs and I am quartering them, (25-mg per day, 1/4 in the morning and 1/4 evening) I am planning to run this amount for my last eight weeks of prep and see what happens!
  • Taking 10-mg of anavar definitely made my muscles pop, I got better pumps and seemed to be stronger. It gave me more motivation to lift.
  • Anavar and primobolan: raspy and hoarse voice . Fluid gain, puffy fingers and face. Felt stronger in my lifts most days. Stopped getting my cycle but came back when I stopped [running the gear]. Clenbuterol: heart racing and skipping beats/anxious. It freaked me out so just stopped. I took that in my bodybuilding prep days though lol. I have not taken it since my powerlifting journey.
  • I have only ever run anavar. In my first 12-week cycle, I put about 200 lbs on my total [in the 148 lb weight class). My dose was 20-mg for six weeks and then 40-mg for the next six weeks. I’m aware that these results are better than normal. However, I also hadn’t taken any form of hormonal birth control in about a decade, and among people I know, those of us who hadn’t been on hormonal birth control seemed to respond better.
  • Increased strength, increased aggression, increased focus, better recovery. Aside from my first cycle of anavar, I never took anything else individually so it’s hard to pinpoint one thing. Halo made me super focused and amped for short bursts (I only took for max effort, not in a cycle). I loved deca, I noticed a good strength increase and improved muscle density.
  • First var cycle caused strength increase, but also water retention and weight gain. This was mostly due to poor nutrition prior to powerlifting. My second and third var cycles were after dialing in nutrition and getting into powerlifting. Good strength gain, better body composition, better recovery. Slight increase in water retention. Oily skin and worsened acne, though I’ve always had issues with that and it was worse 4-6 weeks after coming off. Also some nocturnal leg cramps and insomnia the first few weeks of each cycle. I took NPP and mast for my last cycle and experienced great strength gains and body recomposition, better recovery and less joint pain, increased hair production, even on my face. I lost my menstrual cycle for several months. My voice deepened, I can’t sing anymore, and I experienced enlargement of my clitoris. [After going off cycle] the hair issue went away, but none of the rest. I’ve also used Halo, only 4 doses though and I didn’t really notice anything. With all of these, I noticed a slight decrease in libido. I was also told that I was more irritable and cold, emotionless although I didn’t recognize it.
  • My strength increased and body fat loss was easier. Also improved recovery.
  • I got stronger and they all worked good together.
  • Best results I found in combining one oral and one injectable. First year was 10-mg var only, and I added 200 lbs to my total. Next year was 100 lbs, so far this year it’s 70 more. Although not a steroid, the HGH healed my partial shoulder dislocation.
  • It has helped my appetite. Sometimes I really struggle with having an appetite and anavar helps it (sometimes too much lol). Recovery time is great.
  • My voice isn’t the cute little squeaky “girl” voice anymore, it’s deep and I get called sir on the phone daily. I’ve got a lot more acne now and I’ve grown facial hair. And I have super bad insomnia, but it’s a small price to pay for a big total, right?
  • Increased recovery, increased muscle endurance, increased overhead press ability (strongman). Combining winstrol and anavar helps me cut weight. Combining primo and mast gave me great strength gains but gave me a lot of sides.
  • I had a log of negative side effects with anavar: headaches, hair loss and a lot of depression/anxiety. I had almost zero side effects with EQ. I’ve never combined PED’s.
  • I never noticed any effects when taking Clenbuterol. However, I notice a massive increase in strength when taking anavar. I keep my dosage quite low (10-mg to 15-mg), but it’s been enough to increase my total by 80 pounds in four months. Another effect I notice from Anavar is a decrease in pain/injury flare up. I suffer from five bulging discs and bilateral SI joint dysfunction. Anavar keeps this pain from flaring up (and physical therapy (PT) work, but PT work alone does not keep me injury-free). My muscle mass increases almost instantly on Anavar (within a week I can see noticeable differences).
  • I had improved recovery, and could work harder in the gym, push through sets more. But I also got horrible muscle cramps at first.
  • Slimming, hardened physique. Amazing strength gains. Bigger shoulders especially. Slimmer midsection. I also felt like my mood stabilized.
  • The only thing I took long enough to get anything good out of were anavar and t-bol. Both seem to work similarly and help with recovery, just definitely bloat you if you don’t watch what you eat.
  • I noticed body hair grew thicker and faster. It also started to grow in places it hadn’t before, like the inside of my thighs. My voice gradually got deeper. I had an increase in acne on my face and shoulders. I gain about 8-10 lbs when I go on cycle. My clitoris has grown in size. My sex drive is through the roof during a cycle.
  • Early on it seemed to accentuate my upper body definition and size. I can’t say for sure how much it helped with strength but I can’t say that it hasn’t.
  • I haven’t taken any but have been curious. It’s so hard to find decent research for female athletes
  • I worked with a hormone specialist who suggested 10-mg of test a week, which realistically just puts me in a normal range since my natural test was low. I do feel like it’s changed the way my muscle looks, but not particularly any more than taking anavar. I hated primo, it made a lot of my hair fall out and I saw no benefits from it personally in strength. I used halo and anadrol for meet day.
  • Increased recovery time, muscle hardness and body recomposition.
  • I was finally able to gain weight and hold on to it when I started anavar. I struggled so much with being long and lanky and ropey, which isn’t ideal for what I want to do lifting-wise. I knew I had to grow into my weight class and var made a HUGE difference getting me on that road. The appetite stimulation is great for me and helps me maintain energy for the lifting demand I have. Recovery is SO MUCH EASIER. I don’t feel like hot garbage 100% of the time in meet prep (when I am on cycle), just like, half the time, which is a significant improvement. I read about “super responders” and I appear to be one, since I have gained 11 lbs, 8 lbs, and another 8 lbs on three separate var cycles. Whoops. Happily, for me, most of it stays on when I come off now. I’m also on an antidepressant, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) stim and have an intrauterine device (IUD) and all of those work perfectly alongside the var. That was a pleasant surprise. I actually took Winstrol by accident because I got fake var (womp womp). I got unreal lean lightning fast, like 10 days later I looked like I’d been on cycle eight weeks, but my entire body felt like it was full of glass. No thank you. I’ve taken Halo on meet day twice, but to be honest I probably won’t again. The first time was great, the second time put me at too high a level of arousal. It’s like if you got Vyvanse (a central nervous stimulant medication similar to Adderall), but it hits ALLATONETIMEHOLYCRAP instead of releasing over the course of 14 hours.
  • Just got really strong. Taking anavar, my upper body grew in size and my bench grew drastically (39 lb meet PR added to bench in six-ish months). I only took test suspension and halo for meets, and it made me feel like I could crush someone with my bare hands. It’s not fair men get all the fun drugs. Clenbuterol (Clen), just recently tried it and it’s helping majorly on my cut, only shitty thing is the hand tremors.
  • Only took halo before deads on meet day, and 10-mg of var and 20-mg last two weeks of prep. I didn’t see any sides personally
  • Increased recovery, improved body composition, increased strength.
  • Anavar: weight gain, hair loss, body hair growth, body acne, deepening of the voice, clit growth, jaw line thickening, increased anxiety, sleep deprivation, increased strength. Loss of menstrual cycle.
    D-bol: high blood pressure, nose bleeds, mood swings immediately. Increased anxiety, sleep deprivation, increased body weight. I tried this for 1 week on training days only.
    Halo: increased focus, “rage.” I took this on meet day only.
  • NPP has been the most effective for me when combined with anavar. The joint health improvement is great. 25-mg npp every other day (eod) and 20-mg to 25-mg var daily for 16 weeks into a meet.
  • Overall better recovery and less soreness, more focus and motivation during training sessions, more muscle mass, less body fat, better overall body composition, strength gains and better endurance.

How did progress differ before vs after taking PED’s

  • Progression of weights used has been much quicker.
  • I think I was able to put on a little more muscle mass while “on“ I also notice I tend to lean out through my belly which is harder for me when not taking anything.
  • I progress way faster and more noticeable with PED’s
  • Well I’m sure it sounds cliche but honestly just felt stronger in general. My numbers went up. What might have been a bit of a struggle before started to feel not so bad.
  • I had an initial spike (200 lbs to my total on my first cycle), and then continued to see progress from there. The curve was probably a little steeper than it had been when I wasn’t using anything. I also put on enough muscle to have to move up a weight class, since cutting to 148 was no longer feasible.
  • With PED’s, the strength gain was faster and more consistent.
  • Faster, better recovery on gear. Bench was the biggest change that I noticed. It felt better and moved better.
  • After PED’s my recovery was greatly enhanced. I was also able to build my core strength much easier both times reducing back pain from my bulging disc.
  • My progress was moderate natty probably because it was newbie gains since my first competition I was 16. With PED’s I added 150 lbs to my total in a year
  • It’s hard to say. The first coach I had pushed me so much I got sick all the time. I was just below an elite total before. Now I’m above an elite total in the next weight class up.
  • I got stronger, like really, really fast.
  • I had a decent base strength starting out and was decently strong but after taking them my strength shot through the roof and my entire body composition has changed. I have muscles finally and don’t just look like a blob.
  • My progress increased very quickly.
  • My progress accelerated the moment I started PED’s.
  • It increased incredibly. I put more than 80 pounds on my total within ~4 months this past meet.
  • Progress on PED’s is more drastic and quicker honestly, just able to lift more weight.
  • I had huge jumps when I first started, especially on my bench with just var. Then, as I added compounds, other lifts skyrocketed by 50 lbs to100 lbs.
  • I got pushed into them, so I never really had a chance to see how I would do without them.
  • My first meet I totaled 950, I think. After that I started using anavar. My second meet I totalled 1,080. I progressed very fast with PED’s. My first meet I couldn’t bench 200 lbs. By the second meet I benched in the 220’s
  • I’ve had recurring chronic back pain as a result of poor pelvic positioning and other imbalances which interfered with progress before I started the anavar. I worked (and still am working) very hard to fix these issues, so although I’m making more progress since I started, inevitably some of it is from the corrective work.
  • I don’t know because I haven’t taken any, but am curious
  • I definitely saw a spike in numbers and ability to push myself harder and recover better. I wish i wouldn’t have started as early as I did (my first coach pushed it on me and gave it to me for free for my first year using it. To be honest, I still don’t even know what I was actually taking but I got lean and strong pretty quickly).
  • Handling heavy weights more easily, able to push past what my usual break was.
  • I was progressing before, but just didn’t have the appetite to get enough calories in, so I was slowing/plateauing. Var kicked everything back into high gear. It was like newbie gains part two. My lats/upper back have been a major focal point of training and suddenly, I could train and put mass on my upper body, not just my butt! Magic!
  • I already had a good base before I tried any PED’s but once you get to a certain level of sport you almost have to use them in order to stay with the pack or get ahead. My recovery skyrocketed post-PED usage.
  • I recover better.
  • It’s been very similar. Can handle higher intensity in training now.
  • Taking PED’s allowed me to train more frequently without being fatigued, which made for more rapid strength gains.
  • It was supposed to help me lose weight, it didn’t. I actually swelled up because my body hates me.
  • Progress is exponentially better. Strength and size increase.
  • I was able to add more weight each week and hit the percentages prescribed more consistently on PED’s than off.

When in your fitness journey did you start taking PED’s

  • I started when I was focusing more on bodybuilding, then fell in love with the Big 3 (squat, bench, deadlift) and powerlifting
  • Started lifting in 2014, powerlifting in 2015, first cycle in 2018.
  • Two years in
  • My first bodybuilding show was in 2016. I was all natural and stayed that way until 2019 when I did a 2nd show and tried hgh and clenbuterol. I met my now fiancé in 2018 who is a is a Pro powerlifter, so I will just blame him.
  • I had been competing for four years when I started.
  • About a year in.
  • About 10 years after I became more active in the gym, and four years after being very consistent training 5-7 days a week in the gym. I did one 4-week cycle of var, then didn’t try again for another year or two. Six months into powerlifting I started cycling for meets.
  • Three years into powerlifting.
  • I was 17 almost 18 when i started injecting but did anavar for a few months before that.
  • Three years into my fitness journey, and two years into powerlifting.
  • About three years ago/four years in.
  • Halfway into my first year of powerlifting.
  • After three years.
  • About the two year mark
  • During my fifth year of lifting I started experimenting with anavar.
  • Four years into serious weight training
  • Two years in.
  • Three weeks before my first meet. So maybe seven months in.
  • Near the one year mark
  • October 15, 2019, six years after I started lifting
  • I haven’t yet.
  • Within the second year of fully dedicated powerlifting.
  • Two years in.
  • Roughly five years in and after my fourth meet.
  • Started lifting at 16 and started taking PED’s at 22. I had been powerlifting for one and a half years when I first took them.
  • When I was trying to maintain weight while sick. Two years in maybe.
  • Two years into powerlifting.
  • After four years of competing.
  • About two years in.
  • Three years in.
  • I dabbled in selective androgen receptor modulators (SARMS) and peptides in 2016, but then finally took the leap to PED’s in 2018.

Did anyone pressure you to take PED’s

  • My coach did, they thought it would help me in the gym.
  • No, no one pressured me. Guys in my small gym do but they never tried to have me start. It was a running joke I would eventually.
  • No.
  • No , I practically begged Chris (fiancé) for the longest time and he kept telling me no because it was a rabbit hole and I would always want more. It was 100% my decision.
  • I had a few people who kept saying they wished I would start, but even if they meant to pressure me, I didn’t really take it that way.
  • Nope. It was my choice. I approached my coach with the idea and he had me do research and make a spreadsheet of all of the popular drugs, their desired effects, sides, cycle length, etc. I’m glad he did that, it made me more confident and comfortable and I always made my own decisions on what to take.
  • Yes, my ex-boyfriend and a couple friends at the gym pressured me. The ex got me involved in powerlifting, saw my potential, and wanted to expedite it. Friends were on gear and into bodybuilding. They encouraged it almost as just part of the culture.
  • No. Though a lot of big name lifters tried to get me to start earlier on.
  • First a family friend got me on clenbuterol to lose weight so I could model for him (creepy), then I got more clen and anavar from a friend at the gym but low dosed and didn’t feel it. Then my new coach said he was going to make me a champion if I injected and it’s working so far.
  • No.
  • No, I made the decision after talking to many women who have taken them.
  • Yes, my old coach.
  • I had some close people convince me because they wanted to see me win.
  • No.
  • Originally yes, my ex-boyfriend pressured me tremendously. He had me taking over 40-mg a day, and I hated it. I decided to stop, and start again on my own terms after doing my own research.
  • Not really, my coach helped me understand and ease into the PED world.
  • No.
  • My first coach did. I failed one squat in my prep and he pulled me aside and told me he was giving me anadrol for the rest of prep.
  • No one pressured me. I decided to take PED’s on my own.
  • No.
  • I’ve had male training partners suggest it because “without them I’ll never matter in the sport.”
  • Yes, my first coach. Shitty idiot Lift Big Eat Big (LBEB) who wanted to benefit from my progress to promote his not so great coaching.
  • No.
  • A few other female lifters suggested it. I waited until I felt ready, asked lots of questions, and didn’t feel any pressure to start before I had done my own research and reached a spot athletically where I thought I had plateaued naturally.
  • No. My coach at the time actually pushed against it for as long as he could and never let me take anything other than anavar, which I’m extremely grateful for.
  • I mean, it was highly suggested but at the end of the day I chose to do it.
  • Yes. My partner at the time told me there was no reason for me not to and told me I should.
  • Yes, a coach. They said I had reached my maximum potential naturally and would only continue to progress with PED’s.
  • My lifting partner, boyfriend at the time.
  • No.
  • No.

What was your goal in taking PED’s

  • Get stronger, increase muscle mass past genetic potential.
  • To get stronger!! I only started after I was able to squat 400 lbs on my own, it was just a thing in my head I wanted.
  • To get bigger and stronger.
  • I just wanted to see what I could do as I was venturing down the road of powerlifting and wanted to get stronger.
  • We all have some day at some point when we’ve hit our last PR and our best totals are behind us. I realized that when I looked back on my lifting career, I wanted to feel like I’d pushed myself as far as I could.
  • I just wanted to be leaner and stronger. I never go into anything casually so if I was going to commit my time to powerlifting, I wanted to be one of the best. And I knew to get where I wanted to be, I would be at a disadvantage without PED’s. The leaner part eventually took a back seat to getting stronger.
  • I had poor self esteem and found that I was actually reasonably good at powerlifting. I wanted to get stronger, but also recomp.
  • I had suffered a game changing injury and needed surgery but decided to still do my meet in nine weeks. I started [the SARM’s] BPC 157 and TB 500 at that time and started anavar. I took HGH during off season after surgery.
  • My goal was to become the best in the world.
  • Initially it was to help my immune system. I was tired of taking one step forward and two steps back. I often struggle with a chronic illness and it helped me get over flare ups.
  • I was feeling pretty stagnant and wanted to get stronger and recover better
  • I started taking them because I compete in non-tested federations (of course) and I figured it would help even the playing field. I wanted a 1,000 pound total so I did what it took.
  • In 2017 to try to win strongman nationals.
  • My goal was to train harder for longer and recover quicker to train more frequently.
  • I started taking anavar with the goal of cutting fat while maintaining muscle mass and increasing strength. I simply wanted to be stronger.
  • I started taking them to just get simply stronger! I wanted the improved recovery to be able to push myself harder.
  • To be as strong as possible. And look like I was strong. First goal was a 1000 lb total.
  • I just wanted to finish and not suck at my first meet.
  • I realized that I was naturally pretty strong and that if I used PED’s I had a chance to be one of the best in the world. My goal is to be #1 in the world.
  • Bigger numbers, to be able to do more work and/or recover better.
  • I haven’t started but a reason I am curious about starting them is recovery time and more efficient use of my muscles. I was a collegiate rugby athlete so it was talked about for men but never for us females.
  • I wanted to be stronger and be muscular in a way that my genetics would most likely never allow without them
  • Muscle gain and visceral fat loss.
  • I had plateaued in terms of muscle growth and wanted to get bigger and stronger. I knew I could beat my head against the wall fighting my body’s tendency to stay lean and keep a high metabolism, or I could take PED’s.
  • To become one of the best in the world, and I did just that.
  • To try and stay strong/get stronger while sick.
  • I wanted to be stronger.
  • Wanted to get stronger and leaner.
  • I was trying to lose weight at the time. It was a 20 day cycle. Didn’t do much.
  • I realized if I wanted to be one of the best or the best I had to do what the best were doing.
  • Overall better body composition; better/less recovery time between training sessions; strength & muscle mass gains.

Any reasons beside athletic performance you took PED’s

  • Bodybuilding
  • No.
  • No.
  • No.
  • No.
  • No.
  • Aesthetics, improved recovery, increased healing potential with injury.
  • Main reason was to help with injuries and enhance my recovery as I’m old.
  • No.
  • Yes. To help my immune system a bit.
  • No.
  • I hurt my hip pretty bad and was having a hard time walking. I went to the doctor with no help and the chiropractor and nothing helped me for months. So I researched deca and saw how it helps joints so I gave it a shot (see what I did there) just to be able to walk again, and before I knew it I could deadlift and squat again and I’ve not had pain since.
  • No
  • EQ and peptides have also helped with a lot of my GI issues. I have taken it for that purpose only once but it was effective.
  • I take anavar to keep my disc pain from flaring up, especially during a heavy lifting cycle.
  • Nope!
  • I did like the estrogen lower effects I got. But I strictly only took them for performance.
  • No, I mean other than I feel really fluffy when I’m off.
  • Not that I can think of.
  • No.
  • No.
  • Mostly for performance but the added benefit of looking more muscular is cool.
  • Aesthetics.
  • Nope. I get some positive mood effects, but that’s a happy accident. (I’ve heard the phrase “Varbot”* and I get that a bit. Helpful in my actual job.) I won’t touch them until it’s time for a cycle, which I plan around meets.
  • Just clenbuterol, moreso to cut weight and look better aesthetically. But I do think it’s helping my performance indirectly, I’m stronger and leaner.
  • No.
  • Improved recovery benefits everything. I’m a lot nicer to be around during prep with PED’s.
  • No.
  • Nope.
  • Body image. I like the harder fuller body look.
  • No.

*Varbot: “anavar robot.” Often referred to the tendency for users to become extremely task-oriented in areas they weren’t otherwise. One redditor described the experience as, “Shit needs done, it gets done, sex is efficent and no cuddling after, I have to be a much more mindful person of my moods.”

When is a good time for women to start PED’s

  • I think a lifter will know when they feel is right, I think they should be in and around the sport for some time of course, not sure on an exact amount, maybe 3+ years I’d say, based on me. I would hesitate to start in your first year, just because you don’t even know what kind of strength you can build on your own.
  • I would say at least 2-3 years into lifting
  • I don’t know that I have the answer to that as I myself am fairly new to it. I thank it’s an individual choice that comes down to what you’re willing to risk, etc. For sure though, probably someone who has been in the muscle building/bodybuilding/powerlifting (not even sure what kind of category that is!) world for a while. Newbies certainly should just focus on gaining strength and muscle mass naturally in the beginning and building habits, etc.
  • There are side effects and consequences to PED use. I don’t personally think it makes a lot of sense to risk those consequences unless you’ve competed long enough to know you’re really committed. That length of time will obviously be different for different people. I also think it’s risky to start when you’re so new that you haven’t really mastered technique yet.
  • I think PED’s should wait until natural progress starts to slow. I came into the sport relatively older and I had been lifting for like 15 years before I started. I think it’s important to build up tendon strength and general body awareness before introducing PED’s. There isn’t a specific time frame but just having lifting experience and educating themselves on the drugs should definitely one first.
  • 1. After consistent nutrition and lifting are established.
    2. After they have good, credible knowledge.
    3. Have someone to guide them, a coach, etc. Not just some bro at the gym pushing it.
    4. Preferably after seeing what they can achieve naturally.
    5. At least after basic development. The brain isn’t fully developed until around 25. With a lot of hormonal production and influence generated from the brain, this should be fully developed.
    6. Personal opinion, around mid 20s to early 30s.
  • When they stop making significant gains. I also think age should come in play here as younger lifters may not understand the consequences to their hormones.
  • Whenever she’s mentally ready for the commitment and lifestyle that comes with it.
  • I couldn’t say because it’s very individualized. I personally feel it would be a good idea to try and see how far you can go without them, but everyone should choose their own path.
  • This is a hard question and I don’t feel like I’m experienced enough to answer it.
  • I’m not really sure. It’s up to the lifter. I only truly know what’s best for me
  • They should wait 5-7 years of solid, committed, optimum lifting, nutrition, and recovery before starting.
  • When she feels she is ready and is aware of the risks. I think it should be something you go into prepared both on a physical level, but also hormonally.
  • Whenever she is ready. But preferably after she has had a few years of experience in the fitness world/lifestyle. Someone inexperienced should (probably) not start with PED’s.
  • When it’s physically safe for her (she has gotten blood tests etc.) and is technically proficient enough to really understand what she’s doing and see the long term goals.
  • I think when you have absolutely maximized your natural strength.
  • When she’s ready. When she’s finished a few meets and has a great foundation built and has exhausted all other things.
  • I think it ultimately depends on how serious she is about competition. I would say after 1-2 meets are under her belt and after she has done the research and knows the side effects of taking PED’s. I would hope she would also talk to her coach and see what he or she thinks about the idea.
  • Once they have done their research and can make an informed decision, and have a plan in mind to monitor how it affects them (e.g. getting lab work done before/after).
  • I’m currently trying to figure this out. I know I want to try to push myself to a certain level beforehand, but that level is unclear to me still.
  • When they’ve hit their natural limit peak, or feel like they’re going to be in this for the long haul because sometimes there’s no going back. Hi big ass clit.
  • At least 3+ years in and at least closer to 30 years old.
  • When she feels she has maxed out her natural potential, or close to it. That’s a different time for everyone, especially if someone was an athlete in high school/college. I was four meets in when I took the plunge and had PR’d every time. And when she has done her own, independent research. I googled, I went on the subreddits, I asked every woman I knew who had told me she took PED’s. More important than both of those, though, is to make sure your mental health has been attended to before you ever think about PED’s. I do very well in that department because my medications were already in place before I ever started. I know a fair number of women who suffer from increased anxiety/increased mental health symptoms because they never attended to those things before they added PED’s to their body chemistry. It’s just a terrible idea. PED’s are great, and I don’t think they change you, but they make you more of what you already are; if you are naturally a panic-prone person, and don’t have therapy or meds already on deck for that before you start, you are driving right into the danger zone. If you have body image issues look out, they likely won’t improve with PED’s. Guys are warned about this, especially with tren, but it applies to women, too. Mental health and relational suffering are NEVER worth a few extra pounds on the barbell.
  • Mmm I’m not sure about that. I’d say age-wise at least 21? And do it after you’ve had a few good years of lifting under your belt, newbie gains are a real thing so ride that wave until you can’t, and even then other small changes to nutrition, programming, small lifestyle changes can greatly impact your performance for the better.
  • When they’ve hit their natural peak.
  • Whenever she feels like it’s appropriate. It’s a strongly personal choice.
  • After years of working with a coach and a real program. When progress is no longer being made naturally.
  • I think for anyone who wants to enhance their lifting it’s an option. Anyone who says otherwise can kick rocks. It’s a means to an end. You do what’s necessary to get where you want to be. For me it’s not a thing, for others it can be. Don’t hate on people for what they do.
  • When they have done sufficient research and have acknowledged and understand the side effects.
  • For me, personally, I was in my mid- to late-30’s and felt that my hormones needed some balance/help. Especially being perimenopausal at an earlyish age.

Favorite stack and why?

  • I’ve only taken anavar. I also take fish oil, glucosamine and chondroitin and Vitamin D.
  • Anavar. It’s always given me the results I was looking for.
  • Well seeing as I haven’t tried a ton, I guess so far I can say I’m really liking the anavar/primo combination.
  • I’ve only ever used var, so I can’t really comment.
  • Only because I had my best meet on this: Anavar, t-bol, deca, anadrol, halo.
  • NPP and mast were great, but not worth the virilization. So far, just var gave the best results considering the lesser sides.
  • Don’t know yet. Currently on anavar and a small dose of anadrol. Minimal sides and strength and recovery are good.
  • Tren ace, test, anadrol because they make you the strongest, but deca is nice, too. I think I need to start halfing my tren dose because it mentally fucks with you a lot with very very strong emotions. It just magnifies whatever emotions you already have though.
  • Right now 12.5-mg anadrol every day combined with 100-mg ment (sic?) every week. 1.5-ius HGH every day.
  • I pinky swear I only use anavar.
  • D-bol and deca. It’s just what I’ve took to get the best lifts so far.
  • T-bol and anavar have been great for me. Increased recovery and strength with little to no sides.
  • EQ or straight test have been the easiest for my body to process and have yielded me the best results with minimal side effects.
  • Since clenbuterol did nothing for me, I just take anavar alone. This is mostly due to my lack of knowledge/research on other PED’s, so I do not know what to combine with it.
  • I react really well to var, maybe one day I’ll know!
  • Masteron, var, and NPP. Looks and strength were the best.
  • Anavar and t-bol. They don’t give me any wild side effects. They help a lot with my recovery time and make prep not suck as bad.
  • I’ve only ever taken anavar, primo, and NPP. I really enjoy it and have gotten great results.
  • Not applicable, I’ve only ever done anavar.
  • Don’t know, haven’t taken any yet.
  • I do like the 10-mg test and 10-mg to 20-mg anavar that I take now. Feels the most “normal” without any extra sides.
  • Cardarine (a SARM) and Anavar. I feel less lactic acid build up and quicker recovery.
  • Var 10-mg is all I take most cycles and it’s a good “cruise.”* I might bump up going into a meet or may not. It’s enough I feel it when I train, but not so much I start worrying about my liver/kidneys withering away or have a measurable uptick in blood pressure. I felt gross when I was on 25-mg at three weeks out from a meet.
  • Just anavar as I haven’t tried a ton of other drugs. Use as little as possible for the most result is my motto.
  • 10-mg to 20mg of var.
  • Anavar, 10-mg per day
  • I don’t like any of them.
  • NPP 25-mg every other day and 20-mg to 25mg var daily
  • Var & winstrol. The recomp factor and the strength gains were great.

*”Cruising” refers to taking a regular though usually reduced dose through a period of time not in competition prep. Typically year-round.

In prep, what is your PED “schedule”

  • Kind of answered above. I have run three 12-14 week cycles leading up to a meet. Each time I have increased the milligram dosage by 5 or so. Currently will be starting prep, just ran an offseason six-week block. Off drugs for 6-8 weeks and then back on for the 8 weeks leading up to the meet. I personally feel for me around the 6-8 week mark there is a sweet spot for feeling the most strong and having the most benefit.
  • 10-mg of anavar a day (preferably 5 in the morning and 5 in the evening for 10-12 weeks, then 20-mg for two weeks leading up to a meet.
  • I have a meet in three weeks and this is the first meet that I have ever taken anything for. My first meet was canceled, which was supposed to be in October so I’m not exactly sure what a normal schedule should look like! But I am taking 10-mg anavar daily with primo twice a week currently and will have been on anavar for about 6-7 weeks by the time the meet rolls around.
  • I start running var 12 weeks out. I usually start lower and increase the dose halfway through. Outside of those 12 weeks, I do not run anything.
  • 12 weeks out: 25-mg anavar daily, 10-mg t-bol daily, 75-mg deca weekly. 10 weeks out: Increase deca to 100-mg. 4 weeks out: Add anadrol 25-mg daily, increase deca to 150-mg. Halo was used throughout on max effort days and on meet day.
  • Var 5-mg daily for 4-6 weeks. Then 5-mg twice daily for 1-2 weeks. 15-mg to 20-mg daily the week of the meet. NPP and Mast I can’t recall the dosage, but I was injecting every other day. It was probably 100-mg per week and I ran it for about 12-16 weeks. Halo was supposed to be on heavy lift days only, pre-workout for 4-6 weeks out. Regardless, I took too much and for too long.
  • Anavar, 20-mg each day increasing four weeks out increasing to 40-mg. Anadrol 20-mg per day starting at four weeks out.
  • 1 month out: 1-cc each test e, boldenon, dbol. 2 months out: test e, deca, anadrol. 3 months out: test e, tren, 50-mg anavar (it holds least water for making weight).
  • Usually start the injectable 14 weeks out and an oral 12 weeks out. I don’t usually up the dose going in, just keep everything the same up to meet day.
  • 10-mg anavar in the morning and 10-mg anavar in the evenings. I start 8-12 weeks out from a meet with a one-week break in the middle.
  • 25-mg of d-bol a day. Half a cc of deca on Tuesday and half a cc on Saturday.
  • 6-8 weeks out I start the cycle. From 2-4 weeks out we up the dose. We stop immediately after the show.
  • I typically take 25-mg of EQ a week.
  • I usually will cycle 15-mg of Anavar for six weeks, then come off for six weeks, and repeat.
  • 5-mg a day for three months leading up to meet.
  • 25-mg masteron and NPP three times a week. 25 mg var daily.
  • 16 weeks out I start 10-mg anavar a day split (5mg/am 5mg/pm). 12 weeks out I double the dose. 10 weeks out add t-bol.
  • I take Anavar 10-mg once a day. (2x a day closer to competition). I would take primo and NPP injections twice a week (70-mg each) on Tuesday and Thursday.
  • No change as of right now. I’ve been running 20-mg twice day and haven’t talked to my coach about changing it yet. My meet is in January.
  • Don’t know. But as someone who is interested this info for a female athlete is difficult to be able to find suggestions for based off any research or a depth of experience since it’s not talked about.
  • Honestly wish I had more guidance on this.
  • Anavar 10-mg daily, Cardarine 10-mg twice daily.
  • Var, every morning. Toward the middle of prep, I may take a second dose (same amount) right before training if I have a heavy squat or deadlift. I’ve run long cycles traditionally, which isn’t great healthwise, so that’s something I’m playing with going forward.
  • 10-12 weeks out from a meet I start running anavar, 10-mg everyday. Last 2-4 weeks I up my anavar dose to 20-mg.
  • 10-mg var for 6-8 weeks
  • Current prep: Anavar, 10-mg per day for the last eight weeks of prep. T-bol, 10-mg a day for the last six weeks of prep.
  • Anavar each morning. D-bol-2 hours before training. Halo meet day only.
  • I’ve been experimenting and using myself as a human guinea pig so it has varied and been trial and error every time.

Do you run anything offseason

  • I do not.
  • I, for the first time, just did a six-week cycle for fun and was kind of bored and wanted to see what would happen! I feel like my strength has improved and we are actually maxing so that will be interesting to see!
  • No.
  • No, not yet anyway.
  • No.
  • If anything, just a low dose of Anavar (10-mg) for recovery, but I tried to come completely off during offseason.
  • Not any PED’s. I had natural supplements to help post cycle. I like to give my body a long rest and let my hormones come back to normal inbetween. Also to build strength naturally, see what isn’t recovering well and then figure out why, so I can correct it rather than mask it with drugs.
  • Depends on how my body is recovering. I don’t compete often so most likely would.
  • No, so you can cycle off and let body’s receptors reset.
  • I’ve run a low dose of NPP and var in my off season. It added a lot of muscle and strength. Did it just for fun for a couple months.
  • No I don’t. I want to give my body a break and also I don’t want to spend the money.
  • The only thing I run on offseason is a SARM called RAD-140. Idc what anyone says that shit works too, hit a 460 lb PR squat and that’s all I was running.
  • No. The body needs a break.
  • I do not. If I’m not in prep I try to keep my body as free of stimulants or additional PED’s as possible. I just personally feel this is better for me hormonally and physically.
  • I do not, this is just because my source told me that he recommends I take as much time off as I spent on. So, I do six weeks on and six weeks off.
  • Nope.
  • 10-mg var, 10-mg masteron 3 times a week to keep estrogen low and and not “lose” everything. And honestly I feel like shit not on anything.
  • I used anavar (10-mg) for an off season to try to gauge how much I actually need to be taking.
  • No, I enjoy getting off everything in the off-season.
  • After initially doing 10-mg a day I upped it to 2-0mg a day, and for most of this year it’s been 20-mg twice a day. No difference for off season or meet prep.
  • Nope.
  • Just the weekly test of 10-mg, or 10-mg anavar.
  • Cardarine almost continuously for recovery.
  • I have run var offseason; I did the first cycle just to see how I did, and I responded SUPER WELL. Then I went off for a bit and got back on for meet prep. This last one I got on right at the end of quarantine when it was confirmed gyms were reopening in prep for a meet. I was on too long this last time and I was very ready to come off.
  • Nope. This time I ran clenbuterol but just for a small cut but that’s it.
  • No, but it’s hard not to.
  • No. Organs and hormones need a break.
  • No.
  • 5-mg to 10-mg of var.
  • Sometimes I bridge my cycles with SARMS and/or peptides. I love Ipamorelin for the anti-aging factors.

When going off, wean/taper or cold turkey

  • Taper off.
  • Just stop taking them. I notice my mood is a little shitty for a little while.
  • I taper from 20 my last 2 weeks to 10 for a few days-week, 5 for a week then done.
  • Wean.
  • I go off cold turkey.
  • Ideally, I taper. My last meet I had been on for a lot longer than I like due to meet timing and I was so over taking shit that I came off almost cold turkey. And that was a bad idea. Totally fucked up my hormones and my mental health went to shit.
  • Weaned off var by tapering off by 2.5-mg to 5-mg per week. NPP and Mast came right off.
  • Wean back to 20-mg week after than stop.
  • Cold turkey.
  • I’ve only ever gone cold turkey but suffered the consequence of hormonal imbalance. I’ll taper next time and maybe try Proviron.*
  • Cold turkey.
  • I go cold turkey until I’m getting back into meet prep or until I start to hurt then I’ll take half a cc of deca once a week
  • Cold turkey. I’m not taking high enough doses to taper.
  • I always wean/taper and then do some sort of post cycle therapy which usually involves getting my hormones tested and taking hormonal replacement supplements of some sort to balance my body back out.
  • I do it cold turkey because it is such a low dose. I’m not sure if this is correct, but I haven’t noticed any side effects from doing so.
  • Cold turkey since it’s such a low dose.
  • Cold turkey.
  • I just go cold turkey.
  • Definitely wean off. Your hormones have been altered with the use of PED’s. So weaning off them gives your body the chance to adjust without major issues.
  • I have not stopped yet.
  • I’ve tried both and neither really seemed like there was a huge difference for me.
  • Cold turkey, I’ve personally not experienced side effects from that.
  • Cold turkey. I have used dimdoly methan [DIM, a phytonutrient found in cruciferous vegetables that supposes to aid in estrogen balance] and Testralin [a supplement designed for men over 40 to aid in estrogen-testosterone balance] as supplements when I come off. But really, I don’t notice much other than my endurance in the gym drops and my upper body shrinks. My appetite drops like a rock when I come off.
  • Cold turkey with blood work after to monitor hormone levels.
  • Cold turkey.
  • Cold turkey after a meet.
  • Cold turkey.
  • Cold turkey.
  • I taper down the week post meet and then stop altogether. I’m still trying to figure out if cruising on 5-mg anavar would be something that would help me keep from bottoming out completely and also help with my hormonal issues.

*Mesterolone, sold under the brand name Proviron among others, is an androgen and anabolic steroid medication which is used mainly in the treatment of low testosterone levels. It is a relatively common estrogen blocker in men’s post cycle therapies (PCT’s), but less is known about the necessity of PCT for women.

What PED would you never try again

  • Clenbuterol. Too jittery and anxious!
  • I’ve only run var and continue to run it.
  • I didn’t love EQ because it made me feel bloated and I had tightness. But aside from that I haven’t really had bad experiences.
  • Probably not halo. Just not worth the risk, I don’t think. Maybe? Haha. Never say never. But I don’t think I have the need to. I don’t need that “rage” feeling to lift.
  • Winny because it’s awful: joint pain, dry cracked lips that bleed, hair falling out, voice cracking the first week. Nasty stuff. Superdrol: my organs couldn’t take more than a week on it. Pee was orange, couldn’t eat, felt like shit. Halo: very pricey and didn’t get much out of it.
  • Never tried it but I’m staying away from winnie because it dries you out so bad.
  • Primo ruined my singing voice and almost ruined my speaking voice. I’ll never take it again.
  • Anavar. I know a lot of women prefer it but the results it yielded were minor in comparison to the emotional and physical toll it took on me.
  • I will never try clen again. It increased my heart rate and made me feel bad in general, and I saw no benefits from it.
  • I’ve only heard bad things about deca, never tried though!
  • EQ. Virilization was terrible for me.
  • Anything that ends in “-drol.” Aggressive, clenching my jaw, voice changed, peed blood.
  • Primo
  • Accidentally got winstrol once and ABSOLUTELY NOPE. I looked awesome, like stage-ready after two weeks, but it felt like every joint in my body was full of glass. Plus it’s just so hard on your liver. Not worth it. If I want to be that lean I can just come off and diet.
  • Very underwhelmed with t-bol. Benefit isn’t worth the risk.
  • D-bol, too many dangerous side effects.
  • Anadrol and halo both gave me heart palpitations and acid reflux.
  • I feel like the primo I had was bunk. And if it wasn’t then shame on me. But I didn’t really see much from it.

Side effects, good/bad, what drug?

  • Anavar made my clit grow a bit, voice got somewhat deeper
  • Anavar 10-mg to 15-mg daily, I noticed mild mood change, no real acne, at the beginning I notice a tingling almost or like an increase in blood flow or a slight swelling in my clitoris and labia. Currently anavar 25-mg daily. I have noticed more of a mood change, irritability is increased, I have noticed acne on my face and assumed it is from this increase as I usually get one every so often, I have like 3-5 now. Same feelings with my lady parts.
  • I’ve never experienced any negative side effects from anavar
  • Clenbuterol: premature ventricular contractions (PVC’s/extra heartbeats), racing heart. Anavar/primo: feeling good and energetic in general and stronger in lifts.
  • I have experienced a slight increase in facial hair, but not enough to have to shave or otherwise have a problem. My voice drops a bit when I’ve been on for a couple weeks.
  • Deepened voice, increased hair growth on face/chin, darkening of body hair, enlarged clit, water retention, increased aggression/mood swings, increased blood pressure and nosebleeds, worsened carpal tunnel, increased muscle cramping. Since I almost always stacked, again it’s hard to pinpoint what drugs caused which side effect. I did notice a significant change in my voice when I added in the deca. I have always had an issue with water retention with anavar and anadrol. Also toward the end of the cycle my kidneys would start to hurt and I would have insane low back pumps.
  • Acne: var, NPP, mast. Deepened voice/hoarseness: var, but way worse on NPP and mast. Enlarged clitoris: NPP and mast. Leg cramps: var. Restlessness at night: var. Insomnia: var. Decreased libido: var, NPP, mast. Water retention: NPP and mast, but not much. Worse with var. Irritability, short fuse, cold attitude: var, NPP, mast. Body recomp: var, NPP, mast. Muscle fullness: var, NPP, mast. Body/facial hair: NPP, mast.
  • Good: increased sex drive, easily stimulated. Bad: increase in facial hair, voice changes if introduced too rapidly.
  • My clit grew, mostly after tren, and way more hair growing in places that have never had hair grow and I don’t even have that much hair. It was blonde and now it’s dark, but changes with cycle. My voice changed but when I exercise my voice it doesn’t sound as deep or get as tired. Anadrol made me super aggressive and a horny monster–my poor boyfriend–so it worked towards strength and gives you the best pop and push out of any max effort like halo. I got laser hair removal for my lip and chin and now my cheeks because of tren but only after my second cycle. I’m gonna start taking only half a cc this cycle, we figured out.
  • For all PED’s: loss of period, insomnia, voice deepening over time, clitoral sensitivity over time. Anavar: headaches the first few weeks, muscle hardening, strength without water-weight gain, decent energy, dehydration. Winnie: joint pain, dehydration, hair loss, slight strength increase, muscle gain, muscle hardening. NPP: increase help in joints, muscle gain, acne around jawline only, slight water weight gain, constipation. HGH: headaches and carpal tunnel if dosed too high, otherwise no negatives at the moment. Positives are long term healing. Anadrol: definitive strength and muscle gain, water weight gain, acne, slight hair loss, muscle hardening, veiny. Superdrol: horrible on the organs. Halo: only cycled two weeks at 5-mg every day, not sure, didn’t see anything noticeable. Test no Ester [a fast acting injectable testosterone used primarily as a preworkout]: definite strength increase on bench (third attempt looked like an opener), really bad muscle cramps and bloating though. Ment (sic?): impressive strength without water weight gain, definitely helped support my immune system through a flare up, slight acne, definitely noticed some anxiety/depression.
  • Weight gain because my appetite comes in full force and I don’t always eat well. Deeper voice and so much jaw acne.
  • Deep voice and I’ve got almost a full beard and half the time I can’t sleep to save my life. D-bol caused it and that’s okay.
  • Masteron has given me virilization. Anavar increased my body hair.
  • I have experienced hair loss from my head, slight voice change but nothing major, severe migraines, anxiety and depression all from anavar.
  • Some bad side effects I experienced on anavar: acne, insomnia (occasionally), mild constipation. Good side effects: rapid increase in strength, better body composition, better mood over all.
  • Var gives me bad low back pumps, increased libido, but a more stable mood.
  • Voice change (EQ and NPP). Clit enlargement (everything except var).
  • D-bol and anadrol sucked. They made me grow chin and chest hair. Peed blood. Was extremely moody. Anavar and t-bol have mostly the same side effects. Voice lowers some but goes back. Clit swells but goes back.
  • Hair has been the side effect that I’ve noticed the most. I have to wax my upper lip once a week and I even get little hairs on my chin!!! I didn’t notice the hair until I started primo and NPP. When I was solely taking Anavar my cholesterol levels were bad and my GFR (a test used to rate kidney function) was super low, which is incredibly alarming since I only have one kidney. This was the main reason I switched to taking injectables instead of just oral PED’s.
  • Slightly more upper body muscle definition, added strength, voice may be just a smidge lower.
  • Primo caused bad hair loss.
  • Ostarine in its pill form made me break out heavily. Everything else was pretty mild.
  • Var: uptick in acne (chin/jaw especially, which I’m prone to anyway), weight gain, less emotion, more sensitive lady bits (no growth though thank goodness), higher libido, sometimes painful pumps, especially lower back, migraine from the hormonal shift, occasionally.
  • Irritability is the number one. First four weeks of anavar I’m pretty bitchy.
  • Anavar: acne, lethargy. Tbol: acne.
  • Anavar: increased sex drive, body hair, hair loss, acne, clitoris growth, voice deepening, anxiety, sleep deprivation, weight gain. D-bol: high blood pressure, hair loss, anxiety, sleep deprivation, nose bleeds, weight gain.
  • Receding hairline. Body hair. Facial hair.
  • Facial hair, voice deepening and cracking, clitoral growth/sensitivity, acne, bacne, body hair (all from Var and winnie).

Any surprisingly enjoyable side effects

  • I don’t mind the effects on my clitoris but I wouldn’t want to have a noticeable change in size. (My boyfriend is also a powerlifter and uses test and has tried other orals so we can speak freely about all of this, which is nice).
  • My voice just annoys me because I can’t belt out the high notes when I’m driving as well as I once could.
  • Big clit was fun. I enjoyed the surge of aggression I got from anadrol and halo. I didn’t realize I had it until I came off and noticed my taste in music and porn changed. I’m not an aggressive person by nature so it felt great to have that when lifting.
  • The sex drive and sensitivity factor.
  • I always liked how my clit grew. I thought it was cool and would check everyday to see if it got bigger, and was excited. Tren made it so big but that’s the funnest part. I wasn’t really scared about side effects until people kept on asking if I was sick when my voice changed.
  • Appetite loss: makes cutting easier. Period loss: speaks for itself. Aggression: I’m pretty soft spoken so this boosts confidence a bit.
  • I don’t really mind any of them but the acne and insomnia.
  • Virilization is a tricky one. I don’t mind it from a sex standpoint but it does make me self conscious.
  • The hyper focus of anavar I never minded but I know a lot of people who found it difficult.
  • Increase in libido!
  • Clit enlargement.
  • I don’t mind any of the side effects outside of hair growth and acne.
  • I don’t care about my voice lowering. I don’t care about most of the “negative” side effects except I do not want to experience hair loss.
  • I actually don’t mind the bigger clit and slight deepening of voice
  • I know a lot of girls who are terrified of weight gain who hate the big appetite on var, but that’s exactly what I need, so it works for me. Not mad at the higher libido either.
  • I’ve noticed with clenbuterol I have a decreased sex drive since taking it, but that doesn’t really bother me since I’m single and men are trash anyway.
  • Sex drive, loss of menstrual cycle.
  • I don’t really care about the voice anymore. I’ve gotten used to it and it’s not so bad. Just hard to sing in the car without my voice cracking.

When you go off do you side effects disappear

  • Yes
  • Yes.
  • Sometimes I break out more when I go off.
  • Yes I noticed the puffiness went down and my voice started to recover.
  • Mostly.
  • I have been off for over a year at this point and my voice has improved but has not gone back to what it was before, and I assume it never will. My hair still grows in darker although the face and chin hair eventually stopped being an issue. Everything else pretty much went away.
  • Some like the body and facial hair went away, decrease in oiliness and acne over time. Improves mood. Cramps and insomnia go away.
  • Voice gets better. Sexual side effects go away. Facial hair does not.
  • My acne usually gets so much worse when I’m off cycle but it goes away with a clean diet with quality food and waiting for hormones to balance out and my hair changed back to blonde because it makes my body hair change darker.
  • Most of them within three days, past a certain length of time the voice won’t ever be as high; it depends how long you are on them. Acne tends to stick around for a while until hormones figure themselves out. Usually lose about 5-7 lbs of water.
  • Yes
  • No, unfortunately.
  • Most of them. The extra body hair has never stopped.
  • Yes.
  • Yes, they instantly disappear for me.
  • Yep!
  • Voice change lessens.
  • For the most part. My voice I don’t think is ever going to go all the way back.
  • I still have a bit of acne but this is something I have struggled with my whole life. My sex drive does decrease a little bit. I notice some mood changes as well.
  • Not really
  • Yes
  • Yep. It’s been a subtle shift, generally. Not a hard crash at all.
  • Don’t have any physical sides.
  • Yes.
  • At first they get worse. Then they decrease but don’t completely disappear.
  • No
  • Yes and no. Sometimes the “rebound” effects are shit too. Currently experiencing an extremely long menstrual cycle and a late period with a lot of bloating and cramping. Also I’m purging again, acne-wise, on my back and neck.

Have you ever used a PED you suspect was fake?

  • Currently taking these 50-mg anavar, orange square with “DP” on them. I have them from someone I trust but honestly thought the sides would be worse with this amount considering I have taken a lot less in the past. So I’m not totally convinced they are 50-mgs.
  • HGH: absolutely nothing happened
  • Yes. First time I ran Var, pretty sure it was d-bol or mixed. Increased strength, but quite a bit of water retention and about 10 lbs weight gain in 4-6 weeks.
  • A lot of my last cycles was from sources unknown with bad effects because of toxins and heavy metals, but now this cycle is tested and clean and I feel so much better.
  • Yuuuup. Got d-bol instead of var from my first cycle. Luckily I did my homework and I know my body, so I knew it wasn’t var and stopped immediately. Got winny mixed with var once. Once my lips started to crack, I knew immediately.
  • Nope, I trust my source 100%
  • Took deca once and it was a clear liquid. Didn’t get much out of it at all and thought it wasn’t going to help until I got the real deal
  • No. I have a very trusted personal source.
  • Yes. I tested it then stopped taking it.
  • I have not, but I have known friends that have. She said she noticed she was bloating a TON. So she bought a test kit and found out that someone sold her dianabol labeled as anavar.
  • No.
  • No.
  • I took anavar that was actually d-bol. I gained 18 pounds in two weeks and peed blood.
  • I took some anavar when I first started taking PED’s and the pill was huge! It gave me acid reflux really bad. The anavar pill I take now is very tiny so it makes me wonder if there was something else added to the larger pill.
  • No.
  • No, I haven’t used any but this is something I’ve wondered and how you can tell.
  • Probably.
  • I got var that turned out to be winstrol. I was on it maybe 2.5 weeks when I figured out it wasn’t right. I felt like GARBAGE, every joint was screaming. Threw it out and switched to var I knew was real and felt fine within a week. Risk you take buying from black market.
  • No.
  • No.
  • Yes anavar. Had all the side effects of d-bol. Gained 10 lbs immediately. Nose bleeds daily. Skin turned bright red.
  • Yes. My hair thinned rapidly and I stopped immediately.
  • Primo! Just never saw anything from it at all after using it for 8-10 weeks.

What surprised you about taking PED’s

  • It takes a bit to feel different, and you really have to put in the work to get anything out of it.
  • Nothing much I don’t think. I actually kind of felt like a badass, as it’s fairly taboo for women to use PED’s.
  • How much I like them.
  • Strength, weight gain.
  • I experienced depression and insomnia.
  • How much I felt like superwoman. Just feeling solid and strong and more confident. I pretty much knew what to expect physically, but the mental effect was a nice surprise at first.
  • How quickly it can start to make a difference.
  • How I was never sore.
  • I wasn’t surprised I had a lot of support and people telling me what to expect, but seeing a few chin hairs was surprising but cool to me. But since I dosed and gradually cycled to harsher stuff my side effects were minimal. I only did test and boldenon my first cycle, then next added deca so it wasn’t shocking.
  • How fast they worked (within days). And how easy all the weights felt. I could go forever in a session.
  • How fast they worked.
  • How fast I recovered, and I smell weird when I sweat
  • How weak I feel when I go off of them.
  • The endurance and the capability to push beyond what I thought were my limits.
  • It was very scary to me at first, and I was surprised to notice there weren’t any horrible side effects. So many people told me to “be careful” and that it’s “going to mess me up,” and it never did. It just made everything better.
  • How good I felt, how strong I felt, how quickly I could lift more weight.
  • How much your body changed, and strength.
  • It’s not human Miracle-Gro. You still have to put in just as much work.
  • When I realized that the PED’s were working. I was able to push weights I could never touch before and it was exhilarating.
  • That I noticed zero difference.
  • The voice change.
  • How quickly I noticed the effects, everything took like less than a week.
  • I thought I would feel “something” all day. Turns out I felt totally normal all day until I touched a barbell, and then I felt like superwoman. It was awesome.
  • How fucking awesome I felt in the gym all the time I did shit I never thought was possible.
  • How many people lie about doing it.
  • That they actually worked.
  • Loss of menstrual cycle, and weight gain.
  • The sex drive increase.
  • I got the worst back pumps on car when I first started taking it. And honestly the rate at which body hair grows. Good god.

Advice for new users

  • It’s not a magic pill, you still have to put in the work while training, and with nutrition.
  • Do whatever research you can, talk to other females if you can that you know use PED’s. It would be so nice to have a resource for females, like a private group chat or Facebook group, somewhere to talk to other women about all of these things. I’d love to try something other than anavar but I don’t know what, my guys at the gym really only know guys stuff and it would be so nice to take advice from a woman who has taken other things and had good/bad experiences.
  • Do your research, get guidance from someone with experience, make sure you’re buying reputable gear.
  • Think about it long and hard! Research! Talk to others who have .
  • Start small and do not rely on guidance from men. Talk to women who have personal experience. Plan for an off season. Be strategic and only run in preparation for an event, not just to see what happens.
  • Do your research. Don’t let your boyfriend/coach/whoever tell you what to take. Research the shit and decide on your own what you want to put in your body. Also, don’t jump into PED’s assuming you’re going to go straight to setting records. You still have to put in the time and work with training, food/fluids, and sleeping, perhaps even moreso. They should also be relatively advanced in their training before starting drugs.
  • Do your research. Make sure this is what you want and be prepared for side effects. Stop if you do notice sides. Don’t start unless you have very specific goals and have all other factors dialed in. Get the drugs from a credible, trusted source. Start low and go slow!
  • Start off with an oral at a minimal dose.
  • Don’t be scared to dose higher or try harsher stuff because sometimes you get the same side effects and you don’t get as strong until you dose higher. Also to consider the lifestyle change and how this is permanent.
  • Don’t take advice from men. Talk to as many women about it as possible. Don’t get gear from anyone you don’t know and trust. Do your homework; study up and read scientific journals on anything you decide to put into your body. Sides speed up the higher the dose; start with the bare minimum. Recognize the sides and when to stop. Tell your doctor and get labs done. Take organ support, I can’t stress that enough.
  • Do the research and talk to real people who have actually had experience taking them.
  • Research and try to find someone reliable to help you. Don’t take just anything and be prepared for the consequences.
  • Do your research. And then do some more. Do not take advice from men unless you KNOW they know their information and that they have your best interest at heart. Talk to other women. Learn from other women. Do more research. Learn about the side effects and what you’re actually signing up for because some of the worst side effects are not reversible. Start small and slow when you do start.
  • 1. Know and understand your doses. Know what you’re taking and how you’re supposed to be taking it.
    2. Test the product yourself, no matter who it comes from.
    3. Research and understand what side effects you need to be watching for.
    4. Know when to cycle on/off.
  • Do your research! Do not just listen to what others tell you. Also, reach out to other lifters either through Instagram or in person. There are so many people willing to help you when you wouldn’t really assume so!
  • Take it slow, we all like to think it’s a race to be the strongest, but it’s not! Just being able to compete and make it to the elite level is the goal… and it will come one day.
  • To understand the long term effects. To be smart realize more is not less. Educate yourself. And realize once you start it’s really hard to not want to do them anymore.
  • Wait. Wait until you are not making progress.
  • Do your research and talk to your coach!
  • Do research, find experienced athletes who are willing to talk and share their experiences, try to talk to coaches who have experience with multiple female athletes on PED’s, and find a reputable source. Decide what you’re willing to sacrifice. Understand your goals and how the PED will help attain them.
  • To weigh all the options and realize that it’s expensive and a frustrating process you’re adding in to something that most people are doing for fun or as a hobby.
  • Understand their mental health. It’s all a rollercoaster, even when you stop and aren’t performing quite as well.
  • 1. Get your mental health in order before you start.
    2. Consider the health effects. Are you willing to do blood work, are you willing to risk potential damage to your reproductive system, are you willing to risk irreversible virilization, are you willing to pull back if a doctor identifies a health problem when you’re mid-cycle? Are you willing to stop drinking alcohol, because that’s a huge demand on an already taxed liver? And are you willing to make yourself stop when the meet is over, and show is done, and you just have to go into an offseason?
    3. Have someone watching your back. I had a coach aware of me starting who was on the lookout for behavior changes and virilization effects.
    4. They can make you feel like Wonder Woman, but you aren’t invincible. If anything, it’s even more important to train smart and know your limits.
    5. Know you’re going to need to drink about 48-oz more water than you think you need to every day.
    6. Pack extra deodorant. Ya girl started smelling like an entire NFL locker room until my hormones leveled out.
  • Educate yourself, don’t just follow what some jacked dude in the gym tells you. You’re taking things that will completely alter your body and there are very risky side effects. Ask other women what they do. Do more research. If you do decide to take PED’s, monitor your body often for potential side effects and get blood work done often.
  • Make sure she knows what it means and to trust where she’s getting it from.
  • Do a lot of research and don’t listen to men who don’t know anything.
  • Talk to people, get bloodwork down. Less is more.
  • Do research. Don’t trust men telling you what to run.
  • I feel like it varies for everyone and I don’t know even the tip of the iceberg about PED’s, so I can’t really give any advice aside from: use a reputable source; start slow; and get regular blood panels.

Advice for women looking to up the dose or try something new

  • Be careful with what you take or where you get it. Stop if the sides are having too much effect on you.
  • Weigh the pros and cons. Know what the potential risks are.
  • Talk to other women.
  • Ask yourself why you want to do it and if it is actually necessary and worth the risk that comes along with it, remembering that some sides are there to stay.
  • Low and slow. Sides normally occur faster on subsequent cycles. Run an entire cycle at the same dose. Repeat the same cycle a second or third time before jumping or changing. Consider your goals and what each drug can do, benefits and sides.
  • DO ITTTT it’s worth it and you’ll be stronger. It’s not scary. It’ll open your mind and mental strength, too.
  • Titrate to effect; don’t double your dose, add a little at a time until you get the desired result. For new things, start low-dosed and watch what your body does. Be willing to stop if you see something you don’t like.
  • Research and be ready for the consequences
  • Consider your outside factors first. Are you sleeping enough? Are you eating right? Are you giving it your all in the gym? Check all your boxes first.
  • Make sure the risk is worth the reward.
  • Always research, and get regular blood work if you can. Keep track of EVERYTHING you notice. Everything from mild gas to facial hair. Take note so that you can see if things worsen.
  • Research it!
  • Do it slowly and safely and do as much research as you can. Or reach out to someone who has done it.
  • Do your research. Come to the realization that the effects you are already experiencing may be heightened with a dose increase.
  • Make sure you trust your sources and do research.
  • No advice. Do what you want but understand your drugs.
  • Pretty much the same as advice for starting. “More” is not always “more,” too. But with drugs, not sure you can find that out unless you do it the hard way.
  • Ask yourself why you’re upping the dose. Are there other areas you could improve on before just adding more drugs?
  • Do more research
  • To be honest with themselves about why their current dose is ineffective. If they have weighed all the pros and cons. Make sure to do research and talk to others.
  • I would always say look at all long term side effects of anything. Especially if you are going to have children later in life and know how your hormones affect your organ function.
  • Do research.

How far is too far?

  • There’s no “too far,” it’s your body.
  • I think that everyone has their own “too far.” I think I have boundaries in my head of what I will and won’t take and what I don’t want to have happen to my body that may be permanent.
  • I guess to each their own.
  • Totally up to the individual.
  • I think that’s completely up to the individual. For myself, I told myself I would never take test or tren. That was “too far” for me, simply because I didn’t want the sides that came along with it and maintaining femininity was important to me. Aside from that, I was willing to do what I felt was necessary to achieve my goals. I don’t think it’s for anyone else to decide what is too far for another person
  • Shutting down natural hormone production, poor health (heart disease, hormonal issues, etc.), intolerance sides, when it affects your loved ones negatively.
  • When you start experiencing negative health outcomes.
  • Not cycling off ever or cruising for women.
  • Depends on the person. I’ve gotten away for a few years at very small dosages. I have very thick hair and a baby face and my voice hasn’t deepened beyond recognition, so I’ve been lucky. If I see bone growth in my face I’ll call it. I also have an age I don’t want to push past.
  • This is a personal issue. What’s too far for me, might not be for someone else. I truly don’t want to lose femininity but if someone else doesn’t care about that, that’s their own choice. This is a hobby for me, and I don’t want to sacrifice my looks for it.
  • I’ve not found it yet so I’m not even sure.
  • I do worry about some women who have clearly taken highly androgenic PED’s and are really young and what that will mean for their future. But it is a personal decision so I respect them making that decision.
  • For me it’s too far when it bleeds into what kind of mother and person I am outside of the gym.
  • I don’t believe there is a “too far.” Everyone is individual. We all do what we think is in our own best interests.
  • Too far for sure depends on the person. I think too far is becoming more masculine, but for others that’s a job issue. To each their own!
  • I think that’s your personal preference.
  • I don’t know. I think some women take so much that it seriously makes it unfair. If you have so much drugs in you that you’re barely even a female anymore than fuck off.
  • I would say “too far” is when a woman starts to experience a receding hairline.
  • It’s only too far if you do something you really don’t want to, especially if it’s because of outside pressure/expectations.
  • When you are putting your overall health in jeopardy to a point where you need medications or therapies to deal with outcomes of cycling.
  • When you get the “steroid face” jaw.
  • I wouldn’t want to have a drastic change in my voice. That’s me personally, but I don’t mind it on other females.
  • I’m not touching anything that gives me an adam’s apple, changes my voice, or makes my clit grow. I do eventually want to have a kid, and I know my risks will be higher with what I’ve already taken. I’m simply not willing to risk the virilization side effects on top of that. To be honest, if I have to use a needle for it, I don’t want it.
  • When women completely lose all femininity. Voice changes, overly-jacked, very pronounced jawline that clearly wasn’t there before heavy PED usage. (That’s just my personal preference, the dedication some of these women have to the sport is admirable but I still have to live in this body when I’m done powerlifting. This shit isn’t forever but the side effects from drugs are).
  • When they sacrifice and ignore overall health.
  • I think that when you start passing as male or have medical complications it’s a little iffy but it’s not my place to specify what too far is.
  • For me it was when health problems started occurring, nose bleeds, high blood pressure, going days without sleeping, becoming emotionally unstable.
  • Live and let live, man.
  • That’s up to each person individually.
  • Only when your health is at stake. Otherwise use responsibly and enjoy the journey.

Good starter PED and good dosage

  • Anavar, 5-mg per day, split into morning and night
  • Anavar 10-mg a day I think is a reasonable place to start, but everyone is different on what they think.
  • 5-mg to 10-mg of anavar for 10-12 weeks.
  • Anavar, 10-mg to 20-mg, depending on the person.
  • I think anavar is the best starter, aside from maybe SARM’s. My first cycle of anavar was just 5-mg a day, consistently for 12 weeks. It was perfect. I could feel exactly what it was doing to me with very limited variables and my receptors were wide open so I had incredible results considering the low dosage.
  • Anavar for women. 5-mg daily, split a.m. and p.m. Maximum starting dose at 7.5-mg, split every 8 hours to keep levels equalized. Maybe a little clenbuterol if cutting and no heart issues.
  • Anavar, 10-mg per day.
  • Anavar, 20-mg to 40 mg a day.
  • 10-mg anavar, is generally more than enough depending on body weight.
  • I’d only say anavar because that’s all I have experience with.
  • Mine was 10-mg of anavar. I had no side effects with it but everyone is different.
  • Anavar, 10-mg a day. BUT there is a lot of fake anavar out there. So don’t just get it from anyone.
  • I think it’s different for each person and each situation. I think basic small doses of test may be better and easier to recover from than some of the more complex PED’s.
  • I feel as though what I run is very safe for a starting PED. Maybe a lower dose. 5-mg to 10mg of anavar daily.
  • Var, 5-mg to 10-mg.
  • Anavar, 10-mg a day.
  • Anavar, 10-mg a day for 12 weeks.
  • Anavar is a good starter for women, I think. 10-mg once a day.
  • Anavar, 10-mg.
  • Anavar, 10-mg.
  • SARMS!
  • Var. I started at 10-mg but I’ve heard 5-mg is a good spot to start to see how your body reacts.
  • Low-dose anavar. Pretty low risk pending your drugs are real.
  • 5-mg of var goes a long way.
  • Anavar, 5-mg a day
  • 5-mg to 10-mg anavar.
  • Var, 5-mg to 10-mg, daily
  • Var, 2.5-mg to 5-mg twice a day for 8-10 weeks.

Misconceptions about women and PED’s

  • That it makes you less of a woman and that it’s always super obvious, a lot of people may be using that you don’t realize.
  • Commo: you’ll look like a dude, acne, voice change. Uncommon: sexual sides, maybe.
  • That they make you manly.
  • That “she doesn’t take anything because she doesn’t look manly.”
  • That you can tell when someone is using something. Sometimes you can, sometimes you can’t.
  • The thought that a woman taking steroids is going to immediately turn into a man. There’s such a lack of knowledge, it’s kind of embarrassing. Also the thought that you can just take some drugs and become super strong. Not realizing or acknowledging that you still have to work your ass off to see results.
  • They will make you strong or make you skinny, etc. Nothing works unless you do. They help, but aren’t magic. You still have to work hard if not harder, but the rewards can be more than without PED’s.
  • They make you lean and strong without additional work.
  • It doesn’t make you a man and it doesn’t make you grow a dick or Adam’s apple
  • That they instantly turn you into a man or will sky rocket you to the top of your weight class. If you’re not the genetic elite, both muscle gain and progress can still take years. You might not even get to the top even when on for years.
  • They’re cheaters, lazy, don’t want to be a woman anymore.
  • You’ll have roid rage and you’ll instantly look like a man.
  • That we turn into men. That we grow beards. That we all have tiny penises. Virilization is certainly real but it’s not the same as growing a dick.
  • Common: You will look like a man. You will grow a beard, a dick and an Adam’s apple. Uncommon: You want to fuck 24/7
  • Growing facial hair and voice changes. This does not always happen, and you shouldn’t be so worried about it.
  • That we don’t work hard for what we do because we take drugs.
  • Everything makes you manly. You’ll instantly be strong.
  • That they make you into a man or ruin your body and face.
  • That women are going to turn into men regardless of what they use. Women can still keep the large majority of their femininity while taking steroids.
  • You look like a man, you’re a lesbian if you use them, they do all the work.
  • As someone who hasn’t taken any but know other women who have, I know a misconception is that they are somehow no longer a woman, how it’s not natural, or they just want to be a man.
  • They’re not magic.
  • They’re all jacked out of their minds with power clits. A lot of women I know are still the same as they were just performing better.
  • You won’t instantly look like a dude. You may never look like a dude depending on what you take. You also won’t magically get smarter if you train like a dumbass, and you’re at high risk for injury if you train for Instagram and don’t take into account your ligaments and tendons don’t grow as fast as muscle fibers when you add PED’s to the mix.
  • That if you take steroids you’ll turn into a man–completely untrue.
  • That it’s cheating.
  • Going to turn into a man, that it’s cheating, that we take test.
  • That all women are taking testosterone and tren if they are on steroids. Or if she’s stronger than me she has to be using something crazy that I am not.

Who have you lied to about PED usage?

  • I have never lied about taking them if anyone has asked, but my parents have never asked. My friends who I have told know but no one would assume I believe because I don’t have the stereotypical “look,” I’d guess you’d say.
  • Nobody
  • Friends. I had a random stranger in the gym tell me she was always impressed with my strength and enjoyed watching me lift, then asked if I took anything. I immediately replied “no,” without even thinking about it . I also felt very guilty and still do for not being honest with her.
  • Once I went on, I never again claimed natty, even when I was off. There are people in my life who know details. But mostly I don’t talk to people about it at all, outside of coach, training crew, and boyfriend.
  • I lied to my aunt. She’s a nurse and she asked me about my voice. I told her I had a cold. Mostly because I didn’t feel like it was her business. My dad asked me about 10 times if I was taking anything before I told him the truth. I never really lied to him, I just danced around and avoided the question. He’s just completely uneducated about PED’s and I didn’t feel like listening to his shit. Aside from that I never straight out lied to anyone about it, I just didn’t talk about it.
  • Almost everyone outside of fellow competitors and friends that do them. A couple good friends and my significant other don’t partake and know. My family is very against it. Fear of disappointing them and making them worry. Also would lose my career and possibly my professional license if it were exposed.
  • Coach knows and close friends only.
  • Nobody, just the American Red Cross.
  • More hidden than anything. No one asks so I don’t say anything. Anyone who asks in confidence I usually talk to.
  • No.
  • I’ve had to lie to my family and my job.
  • I have not told my parents or any friends outside of the lifting world. They just wouldn’t understand.
  • Yes.
  • Just my parents and family members because I know they will not approve. I’m open about it with anyone else.
  • Boyfriend, and parents I’ve lied to. They judge and think it’s cheating and my accomplishments won’t matter.
  • Job, the stigma attached.
  • My family and friends that don’t lift. It’s too much to explain. I’d rather just not have to answer so many questions and end up arguing with someone.
  • Yes. I lied at first to my family but they eventually put two and two together. They accept what I do and are supportive.
  • No
  • Husband, family, friends not in powerlifting.
  • No.
  • My parents and my workplace. My parents simply don’t need to know, and consider it cheating (I don’t). I think they’ve figured it out and they don’t ask anymore. My workplace doesn’t need to know I’m taking a black market substance off-label. They could probably guess, too, but they don’t ask.
  • My parents.
  • No one.
  • Parents, acquaintances, non-close friends.
  • No one.
  • Yes. Parents would worry.
  • Parents. They just wouldn’t get it and they’re super closed-minded about it anyway so I don’t even engage.

If you could change something about your past usage, what?

  • Less stigma about learning about drugs and what they can do for you.
  • To have a better understanding and knowledge about PED’s and maybe it would have been nice to have a woman as a mentor to be able to ask questions and be totally open and honest with.
  • Nothing.
  • I believe I would have started sooner truthfully. I Am a nurse and health is important. I have seen some folks in scary situations from misuse, but I also feel there is a safe way to go about it like keeping a check in blood work, blood pressure, etc .
  • Nothing.
  • I would have taken the cycling-off process more seriously. I believe that the last time dramatically affected my mental health and I would never want to go through that again.
  • I would have done less and not as long of cycles. More time off on some cycles. Stopped when I noticed the sides.
  • I wish I had women who ran stuff to talk to to help guide me as men always have “great” ideas on what I should run.
  • Nothing. Maybe use half a cc of tren instead of a full one.
  • I don’t have any regrets yet, ask me again in three years.
  • Nothing.
  • Nothing so far.
  • I would have waited longer and used less from the get-go.
  • I would have learned more earlier on so that I could better monitor and cycle myself instead of leaving it to the judgment of coaches or others.
  • I wouldn’t have allowed my ex to put me on 40-mg+ of anavar daily. It really put a bad taste in my mouth until I decided to (cautiously) try it again.
  • More knowledge out there for women, having frank conversations with women about them.
  • No.
  • I wish I waited.
  • I have had a great experience. I don’t think that I would change anything.
  • No change.
  • I would be more open about being interested in trying them.
  • Have better resources of knowledge.
  • More information from women and credible resources.
  • Honestly, no. I’ve generally had a pretty positive experience and I’m glad I waited as long as I did.
  • Nothing, I think I’ve been very smart about my usage and I don’t regret taking them.
  • I would’ve waited.
  • Legalize and destigmatize them. The vast majority of athletes use some form of PED or other.
  • Starting them later. Getting bloodwork done.
  • Not for me, but I dislike how many people judge others. Get a life and work harder on yourself.

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